Minnesota Eagles Illegally Catching Walleye on Lake Mille Lacs

bald-eagle-fishMinnesota DNR Special Investigator Steve McFasland has won state recognition for his work in stopping the unlawful harvesting of walleye by Minnesota eagles from lake Mille Lacs. Since this spring’s surprise announcement from the DNR, it is illegal to catch and keep a walleye fish.

“Special Agent McFasland has been instrumental in stopping over a dozen eagles this past week alone!”, says Special Agent in Charge, Jephery Logan. “He really knows how to find them and arrest them with the fish in hand, so-to-speak!”

Agent McFasland got a monetary award and a plaque from Governor Mark Dayton during the governor’s annual walleye dinner.

Hillary Clinton Locks up North Korea’s Electoral Votes

In the Phillary-clinton-thumbs-upresidential battle of the century, Hilllary Clinton announced yesterday that she won the Democratic caucus of North Korea.

“Pyongyang has been very, very good for us!”, said Clinton’s lead canvasser in North Korea, Jen Sung Park.

With this latest win, Clinton finally looks to defeat Bernie Sanders and knock him out of contention. However, with her upcoming jail time for the email scandal, the North Korean win might ultimately mean nothing.

 

Google Debuts the CR-49 Notebook

Hot on the heels of the CR-48 “Mario” Chromebook, Google has announced the CR-49 “Luigi” Chromebook”

The benefit of the CR-49″‘ says Google’s Everhardt Schlid, “is that the whole internet is on this laptop. The whole thing, all of it.” Later Schlid went on to say that “A CR-49 user won’t need a data account because we have packed the whole internet on this little laptop.”

It is unknown how many CR-49’s are in production or what the cost will be. However, if it is anything like the CR-48, they just might be given out for free.