Officials at the Metro Club were dismayed yesterday afternoon after realizing that the fund raiser that was recently held did not actually raise any funds. “I don’t understand why it didn’t work”, said promoter Richard Guelian. “I thought it was going to be a fool proof idea.”

The Metro Club had decided to have a sale to try and drum up interest in joining the club. “We had an overwhelming interest from people wanting more information about our club, but it seems that they really only wanted free muffins”, said Guelian. “Next year we will probably do things different.”

Anyone interested in the metro club can contact Richard Guelian at joe@aol.com. “We hope to get our membership up to at least 4 people by January.”